Wednesday, January 14, 2009


Note: writings are meant for certain people that I am sure do not read my blog. So for those who are here, an early reminder would be, the frustration that you could sense is not meant for you but it could be to anyone else that you think is related. And please, don’t be hurt by my writings. I really do not wish for there to be any hurt feelings but at the same time I do feel the need to say all this as several incidents have caused me to suffer inside. :(

Face ignorance with wisdom

So that’s what they say. But how actually do you do that? Be wise, I mean. Ignorance happens when people simply don’t own enough knowledge about something but remain doing nothing about it and at the same time act as if they know all about that something. It also happens when they do have the knowledge but simply refuse to accept the truth as it will affect their own understanding of a certain issue and thus cause them to change something that they have all along hold on to.

Well that, is my definition of ignorance. Of course, there could be all sorts of other ignorance that could be explained differently but I think what I have here is enough to explain what I have kept inside for so many times before.

Go ahead, ignore people when they assume something that you are not, go ahead eat something that you have always craved for although you know that it’ll cost you a one hour jog, and go ahead procrastinate your work if you feel that last minute work is always the best. Those types of ignorance I could tolerate.

But what bothers me most is the ignorance about our Deen. About Islam. (yes, the Gaza issue is being hotly debated nowadays. My dear brothers and sisters in Palestine, you are in my prayers.) But right now, let me focus on one issue first for if I blurt everything at once, I fear that this well end up badly. Excuse me if this post is rather emotional. There is no excuse for it except that this issue is emotional for me.

First of all, let me remind my readers, that I am not an ustazah, but I am a humble but proud Muslimah. And me, being one, I feel insulted when people with such a high level of intelligence refuse to understand the true meaning of Islam simply because they choose not to do so. And this, I accept as a sign of ignorance. Because like I said, people with such knowledge would be impossible to deny that they have received the proper education about what is and what is not in Islam. Again, let me remind you, I am not an ustazah, but I am a Muslimah.

Islam is the way of life. The wisdom of Allah swt is beyond our thinking. If we think we’re brilliant, well imagine how brilliant Allah swt, The One who created us, is. Every single act that we do is accomplished because Allah lets us to. Even the simple act of blinking an eye. It seems so effortless doesn’t it? Open, close, open, close. But imagine, if we can’t blink our eyes in just 5 minutes. What do you think will happen? Everything that we do is because Allah lets us to. We have no will whatsoever without Allah’s permission.

Then who are we to be so arrogant to question the rules of Allah? Who are we to play around with his words in the Al Quranul Karim? Who are we to interpret by our own idiotic thinking of the sunnahs of Rasulullah saw(the love of Allah)? Who are we???

Islam is syumul. Syumul means complete. Do not think what is applied in thousands of years before cannot be applied now. Whoever thinks like that is simply being ignorant. The rules in which Allah swt has set in the Al Quran is not meant to be updated every millennium or so. It is made to be obeyed for eternity.

“But they have Rasullullah. They live with him. They get to see what Rasulullah is like. They get to see his mukjizats. So it must be easy for them to obey Rasulullah. But us, we’re so far away from our beloved prophet. We only learn about him in the Quran, when we learn Pendidikan Agama Islam in school, when we read Buku Kisah-Kisah Nabi. But we’ve never actually met him. So it’s acceptable if we do our own adjustments to the life that we’re living now. The ever glamorous modern life that we are so proud and so sad to leave one day. It’s fair right?”

If we really do think Islam is that kind of deen that the rules have to be adjusted to suit our life, our interests, our desires, then again there is no other term then simple ignorance. Though I sometimes feel like using the term stupidity as people who have received the education, should actually understand what is right and what is wrong. But perhaps, ignorance comes with the inability to understand. Or perhaps the refusal to understand. Which means they ignore. And also to me, is worse than being stupid.

Don’t you think it is weird when people say, “it is what the inside that counts.” “Don’t assume people wearing revealing clothes are not as good as you.” “ Islam is all about niat. All about what is in our hearts. Our pure, sincere intentions. Don’t judge a book by its cover. Bla..bla.. bla..” But out of nowhere, they say, “Oh, Islam is not about wearing kopiahs, or tudung labuhs. Even bad people can wear that,”

Well actually, I couldn’t agree more. Islam should not be based on what we wear or not wear. It is not the measurement of one’s faith and Iman to Allah swt. But why do the ulamaks where them? Because it’s their identity? It’s like policemen having their blue uniforms. So pious Muslims have their kopiahs, serbans, jubahs, etc. Is that it? As just an identity?

To me, its simple. The act of love requires obeying, sacrifice and sincere deeds. When we love someone, we’d do anything to prove it. Lautan api sanggup kurenangi, gunung sanggupku daki kerna cintaku padamu, oh sayangku. Then what is the difference when we love Allah swt? If we claim, we love Allah and our deen, then where are our sacrifices? Allah says, pray 5 times a day. Then why is it when we are out shopping, we feel that its too hard to sacrifice our 10mins time to go find a surau and pray? Allah says cover your aurat. Then why are we giving excuses that Islam is not about physical so covering aurat is unimportant? Please, stop making our ignorance as an excuse to not being an obeying Muslim. Please. If you chose to ignore, then simply admit that you are being ignorant and stop making your own selfish, logical thinking to support what you think is actually correct. Because its not. What is stated in the Quran and hadiths are correct. What our minds think are what our foolish minds think. They are influenced by desires and endless desires. So stop making our ideas as a base of our understanding of Islam and adjust it to fit the life according to our own desired ways. Please. Don’t.

So answering the question why do alim ulamaks wear all those attires that they wear? Aren’t those clothes just the culture of Arabs? Well perhaps, yes. Isn’t our Rasulullah saw an Arab? So isn’t whatever he does is a sunnah? And isn’t in sunnah there will be virtue? Like breaking our fast with kurma. Why is that easy to be accepted? Because it requires eating? Something easy to be done?

We say when those pious people actually become nearer to Allah swt, they become judgemental and feel that whatever they are doing now is the best and others are all sinners. Why do we feel that way? Because these people try to remind us? Try to tell us that what we’re doing is wrong? Try to do dakwah? Because of those reasons, we say, “Oh, he thinks he’s so good. Telling me to go pray. I know lah when to pray. He thinks he’s the only one who prays ke??” Well, maybe we do pray. And maybe our level of khusyukness is much higher than him but does it make him so awful to care about us and remind us to pray with him? You see, it has never been so wrong than in this context which is dakwah, to care for someone. When caring is accepted as arrogance and showing off. What about the fact that, when one is left to live a sinful life, then the whole community will be given bala from Allah swt. And what about the fact that, when we don’t help each other, those who have not been helped ever before will claim that in front of Allah swt in akhirat? They’ll say, “my room-mate prays 5 times a day but he never asked me to join him. So its his fault that I’m like this”

Oh and a clear example is one of the offline messages I received yesterday,

UCAPAN PALESTIN KPD KITA: Jikalau kami gugur syahid, dan anda sekelian terus diam membisu dan hanya menyaksikan sahaja, nantikan hari pembalasan. Kami akan tuntut dari Allah di atas kelembapan anda semua. Kami tidak akan redha terhadap kelesuan dan kebisuan anda semua. Kami tidak akan memaafkannya.

Allah swt made us brothers and sisters for a reason. For us to care and love each other. And what better love is to make us closer to Allah swt together.

People who really do understand Islam and practice it, would not judge a person by what they do and what they don’t do. Why? Simply because we have no right to do that. The only one who does, is Allah swt. Only Allah will decide whose deeds will He award and whose sins will be punished. We, have no right to say, “because he doesn’t pray, he’ll go to hell” or “because she doesn’t covers her aurat, she’ll go to hell.” Because we never know if one day Allah will grant them hidayah much better than what we own. (I have friends who don't cover their aurat but are so much nicer than those who do).

Remember the story about the woman who works as a sex worker? Well, she does zina everyday. Her life is supposedly full of unforgivable sins. But one day, she helped a dog that was really thirsty. And with that simple act of kindness, Allah swt gave her the highest level of hidayah. And when people ask, “Eh how come she’s in heaven? What about all her sins that she made?” Allah answers, “What sins?”

So no, Islam is not completely about physical. Yes, our intentions do matter. But when someone does make their physical apparent as a true Muslim as a follower of sunnah Rasulullah saw, why must we judge? Do they really judge you? I mean if they do, would they not feel you unworthy to be cared for? Thus not giving a damn about you? As in not reminding you to pray or stop making Allah mad? They do care. Because they care, they want to help. So in return of people’s help, shouldn’t we say thank you rather than accusing them of just being a show off or judgmental?

This is the longest post I have ever made. As you can guess, this issue has been bothering me for quite some time and being this weak me, I fail to stand up and say it out loud to the people who I’ve heard saying this. Forgive me, I am a coward. So I choose this little blog of mine to be my mouth and state what I feel. I hope this would benefit those who are nice enough to read every word and if it hasn’t benefit you at all or in fact caused you any harm, please forgive me. I am after all, not an ustazah. But I am a Muslimah.


  1. azie, sumhow i think of so many things in my head but i cant express them in words. i still have so much to learn! i just wanna say this is smtg i've felt for a long time too but never had the guts to say or intelligence to type it out. the era we live in now, the culture, the ways of living, the openness completely saddens me. people are braver and bolder in creating new rules or bending them even. and it makes me feel helpless. nak sedarkan org but diri ni pun x ok sgt. nak ckp smtg pun takut bcuz again, i myself still have so much more to learn. but at least i know what is wrong and what is right. i am aware. and i know ppl now are too but they choose to ignore, bcuz of wanting to fulfill their short-term desires. org skrg bukan bodoh or ignorant. they chose to be that way. in a funny way, they are actually smart tp dumb jgk. u know what i mean? and like these smart ppl say, "ala biarla aku, kita kubur lain2." ada point. biarla org tu jd ignorant and stupid. they hv choices and they chose what they want. we, and ppl who are aware, on the other hand, have the priority to improve ourselves more, not the other way arnd. not reverse or gostan mane2. kene ke arah yg lebih baik. neway, kudos to u azie for writing this. ur far from being a coward. i think its actually d opposite :)

    p.s: sory if i dont make sense! :))

  2. "azie, sumhow i think of so many things in my head but i cant express them in words."

    there, you've said them all so perfectly yourself, nashrah!

    i understand when u say we feel unqualified to go reminding ppl but then again, if we dont, wouldnt we regret it in akhirat when they blame us? i know that feeling. "ala camna nak cakap ni.. im not that baik pun nak nasihat org" tapi for me, i think of it as a process of sharing information and learning together. whatever that i just read or heard, i'll share it with my frens so that we could benefit together. so thats my way of reminding. and alhamdulillah, they'll do the same for me. whatever that they think im doing wrong, they'll remind me and i'll accept it because we're all not perfect.

    but alhamdulillah, im relieved that u got my point nashrah. and as always, thank u so much for ur support. (i still think im a coward tho hehe)

    p.s: you've made urself crystal clear! ;)

  3. It's funny when u ARE aware that other people also have the same mind with u on certain issues, the same dilemma, but u chose to think that u are on ur own, alone having the complicated mind, thus afraid to blurt it out, to share and discuss.

    Ok, it's not. it's actually frustrating.

    Glad that u stand up for what u believe is true and made up ur mind on how it should be. My thoughts are still tangled up inside tho, but u lined yours almost perfectly. :)

    *i'm kinda doin the selfupgrading nwadays. haha..yet still strugling with the dresscode. x tawlah nape susah sgt nk cover aurat nie.. (-.-)'. n reading ur entries sometimes motivates me lots*

    thank you.

  4. ellyjen! its been awhile since i heard from u! hw r u?

    im not sure about me sharing the same thoughts with others because from my experience, i always feel that im alone in certain issues. and having them being so boldly brave to state what they feel just makes me feel like a coward to not do the same.

    but having readers like u that say just the sweetest things makes my courage go up and up a bit. so its me who should say thank you. : )

    *aurat. hmm, ur not the only one sista. believe me, we're all struggling. but hey, having the awareness is a good step. : )

  5. Hohoho.

    A long one, indeed. But at least, I've finished reading it (and drop a comment too).

    This is one good writing, methink. We ALWAYS have choices to choose everyday. To wake up from bed or curl in the comfy blanket. Just like what Shakespeare's said, 'To be or not to be', no?

    Well. It's just another war raging inside us, every single day.
    A battle that we jump right into every day.
    A battle that comes from within.

  6. a battle. yes, it is. and im tired of losing.
    i need to win sometimes. so saying it here is one of the beginning steps of emerging.
    hope everything will turn out ok in the end.

    thanks moja. :)